The People Who Carve Messages onto the Walls of Bathroom Stalls...

I just want to meet the guy who brings a pen, pencil, knife, switchblade, katana, etc. into a bathroom with them with the oh-so-noble intentions of 1) writing a racist, homophobic, provincial message for all poopers to see, and 2) sitting on the can long enough to scratch out the phrase, "GEORGE WATCHES GAY PORN."

This is kind of a microcosm of the current problems of our time that I like to propose. If only this moron spent as much time reading the newspaper or, God forbid I say this (as an 18 year old), a NOVEL as opposed to thinking of the next potty-break insult to write in the restroom, we'd have one more scholar and one less vandal. It's a 2-point swing for the good guys. Squat on that. 

And PS: To whomever wrote that on the stall: don't be upset that you're a dumb-ass resorting to insulting "GEORGE" via stall-graffiti. And odds are "GEORGE" does not watch "GAY PORN," you're probably just upset that he might've gotten a better grade than you, one-upped you in a sporting event, or got with the girl that you lost your chance with 'cause you're an utter jackass. 

PPS: I wrote this while I was on the toilet. Baller Status.